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Is There A Docker In The House?

I don’t know who the official czar of English slang is.  But I want to challenge the slang usage of a word.

“Docking.”

I’m going to be showing my ignorance here, but for the  near twenty-two years that I have been sticking my pecker in warm, wet, tight1 places, and doing a lot of the activities that sometimes go along with it, I have thought that “docking” was just another way of saying “fucking.”

As in “HDP.”

Human Docking Procedure.

Until recently, I had no idea it had anything to do with foreskins.

Maybe because I don’t have much experience with them.  Foreskins, that is.  Granted the doctor left me with a little extra skin, but only enough extra enough to make my stuff  handle a bit thicker.  Not enough to be pulling it over the head of another man’s pecker.

So, inexperience makes my ignorance at least a little bit justified.

Even if it doesn’t, the actual process of what is currently known as “docking” completely does.

From the way I understand it, two fellas put their heads together2 and one slides his foreskin over  the others dong.

That’s not docking.  That’s throwing a tarp over the woodpile.

So why not call it “tarping?”

“Docking” is putting something inside something else, not covering something with something else.

You bring the ship a ship into the dock.  You drive the truck into the  factory dock.  Something goes into the dock.

And then you unload.3

I have to say fucking sounds a lot more like it should be called “docking” than eskimo kissing your dongs inside a sleeve does.

Even the frightening practice of “sounding” is more like docking than “docking.”  Although, it doesn’t seem like a very sound practice if you ask me.

“Sleeving.”

That’s a better word for it.  Even better than “tarping.” I mean you have to tie a tarp down.  “Tarping” is better saved for the BDSM version of  the act.

So, I’m sending out an appeal to the Secretary of Sexual Slang, and the uncircumcised of the world, that from now own, for the sake of clarity, that “docking” be called “sleeving.”

But, then, what if you have a fella back the eye of his storm up to you and wraps his innards around your meat.  Could that be “sleeving” too?

Nah.  That’s just what it’s always been:

A damned good piece of ass.

{ fin }

  1. hopefully []
  2. And I don’t mean to brainstorm. []
  3. To loading dock, which is always in the rear. []
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18 Comments

  1. Paul from Q Paul from Q

    “the eye of his storm” Wow, what an image. And languages do evolve so you may be on to something.

  2. How about SKINNING? No, that’s something else altogether.
    I do have further comments but will withhold them here. Because, as it stands, I’ve broken out in a sweat and my pulse has quickened.

  3. Harland Harland

    Tony,

    I totally agree with you. I never “got” the word docking.

    hh

  4. I am totally for your new updated use of Docking, In fact I think Ill tell my husband I need to be docked right away!

  5. David David

    I still don’t know what “sounding” is. I’ll go look it up; something tells me it’s not going to be a hard definition to find. Something also tells me I’m not going to like it.

    If “docking” was simply “fucking” then everyone would be doing it. I think we should give the hooded ones the ownershp of that one.

  6. Can’t dock. The mohel didn’t leave me anything to dock with.

  7. Michael Michael

    Speaking from experience in a world where medical intervention towards the penis is strictly reserved to those of Jewish or Islamic persuasion and where skin can hang like a curtain without attracting too much attention, the word is Hood. What goes over the head is a hood so technically and to avoid confusion it should be called Hooding or Hood sharing. Or perhaps more poetically Robbin’ Hood.

    Best wishes and keep writing.

  8. brian brian

    Somehow, the image of Science Fiction space exploration come to mind when I think of “Docking”.Kinda like Star Wars. I am sure I’m missing something!

  9. This is, quite simply, the best treatise on a slang term that I have ever read.

  10. California Alex California Alex

    Upholstering? Slip covering? Wouldn’t mind having someone do that to me. Couldn’t reciprocate, through.

  11. Mike Mike

    need to be contrary guy here … “docking” is a great word … think about how two spacecrafts hook up, two sleeves meeting, overlapping, and then exchanging cargo “loads”

    and generally, life is all about theme and variation … docking itself is totally hot, particularly if one or both partners toss out some good pre-cum … think of it as great appetizer prior to the main course.

  12. As always I love your way with language, Tony. And yah, Bri, I think docking in this case must’ve come from the sci-fi genre. It’s the only way it makes sense.

  13. I took my first personal loans when I was not very old and it helped my relatives very much. However, I need the secured loan as well.

  14. My friends and I laughed for ten minutes off of this entry.
    I actually have never put much thought into docking. It doesn’t seem all that pleasurable to me.

  15. Hombre1947 Hombre1947

    I’d attach a hot picture of docking, if I could.

  16. Ali Ali

    Awesome Post. I add this Post to my bookmarks.

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