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HeartSong

February 28th, 2011 § 6 comments § permalink

30+ Day Challenge, Part 24 – Favorite Song

I only download1 music that I really like a lot onto my iPod.  Since it is only about 1% full, it shouldn’t be too hard for me to pick out a favorite song.

I didn’t even need to consult the iPod to come to the conclusion that the winner is either “Tennessee Waltz” or “I’ll Always Love You.”2

But, which one?  Almost all the songs I like, I like for different reasons.  So, what makes one more of a favorite than the other.

Thinking about it, I realized that “Tennessee Waltz” was a favorite not because of the song, but because of what it represents to me.

It reminds me of my grandparents in days gone by.

No, they didn’t have a “Tennessee Waltz” moment where another woman stole my Grandaddy away.3  But it was a song that was a favorite of theirs and they used to sing it together all the time.  I still remember them sitting on the screen porch in the evening, Granny singing quietly and Grandaddy whistling the harmony.

That song, for me, is really more about them than something that speaks to me.  So, I can’t claim it as the favorite.

“I’ll Always Love You” definitely speaks to me.

Not because of anything that has happened in my life.

But I believe in what it has to say.

Dolly wrote the song in response to her decision to get out from underneath Porter Wagonner’s wing and strike out on her own as a recording artist.  She had been a regular on his TV show a couple of years, and was outgrowing him.  It was a tough thing for her to leave the show, but she would be forever grateful and love him for giving her a start.

So, even though the song was written about a business relationship, it mirrors what can happen in a true love affair.  You can grow apart from someone, and know that you are not the best thing for each other, but it doesn’t mean you will love them any less.

I believe in that.

Mostly because I think that when you truly, truly love someone, nothing can make you stop loving them.

Relationships end.  Love is ever-lasting.

The Attorney and I have a happy relationship.  But, I’m not fooling myself into thinking that something couldn’t happen one day that would cause it to be over.

But I’m also not fooling myself into thinking that I could stop loving or being there for him, either.

Because “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough.”4

Another favorite.

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  1. Pay for. []
  2. Dolly Parton, not Whitney Houston. []
  3. Or Granny stealing him from another woman, as far as I know. []
  4. The stuff that begins around the 2:00 mark cracks me up! []

Five Good Things

February 25th, 2011 § 19 comments § permalink

30+Day Challenge, Part 23 – 5 Good Things That Happened Since Starting the Challenge

  • One day during lunch I went through a drive through.  By the time I got to the window, I realized I did not have my wallet on me.  When I told the girl at the window, she told me it was okay and gave me my order anyway.  I offered to come back in 10 minutes with the money.  She said not to worry about it.  But, I did.  I worried that she would get in trouble for her drawer being short.  So I did come back later with the money.
  • In a previous post I joked that I would be willing to take free samples from AussieBum.  Turns out somebody from the company caught it and they sent me four pairs of underwear.  In return, I promised I would post a picture.  I was unsure about them at first because they are more brief than I usually wear, but once I got them on, they looked pretty good.  And they are amazingly comfortable.  Doesn’t feel like I’m taking a blood pressure test like other briefs.
  • I found a good little chunk of money I had hidden away several years ago.  Nice surprise.
  • Around this time last year I decided I wanted to get a kilt.  A real one. I never did because they were just too expensive.  A week or so ago I found a place online where I could order an affordable one.  Now waiting for it to be made and arrive from Scotland.  Just in time for Springtime hikes through the mountains.
  • Car Head. Yes, it’s just what you think. And it was awesome.

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Another Man’s Shoes

February 24th, 2011 § 15 comments § permalink

I can be uptight.

It’s true.  As easy-going as I am about most things, there are some things I just can’t let go of.

The Attorney was up to the house the other evening and he brought with him three pairs of shoes.

Running shoes to be specific.

His running shoes to be more specific.

Well, to be truly specific, they are running shoes that he bought and, for whatever reason, did not make the cut to be a part of his regular rotation of running shoes.1

He had not worn any of the pairs more than a handful of times.  So, rather than throw them away he thought I might like them.

I don’t run, but I do like athletic shoes.  And size 14 is not always easy to come by.

Even so, I had to pass on them.

I know that on some level this is totally irrational, and no doubt connected to the issues I have with feet2, but the idea of wearing another man’s shoes really creeps me out.

Granted, I have worn a pair of The Attorney’s dress shoes once before out of necessity.  But these are athletic shoes.  Shoes that his big long-toed feet have sweated in.

True, he only wore them maybe 3-4 times each and there was always a sock in between shoes and flesh.  But a sock is not a sponge.  Unless, he wrapped his feet in a Sham Wow3 while hitting the pavement, there was some sweating into those insoles.

I have never hidden the fact that I am a little bit of a germ-a-phobe.

It bothers me that this bothers me.

I mean, it’s The Attorney.  Not some stranger.  I have visited virtually every square inch of his body over the last several years, and had much of it in my mouth (or at the very least against my lips or tongue).  If I am going to catch it, I already have it.

So, why am I bothered by the thought of wearing practically brand new shoes that he has stood in?

It’s the same thing that makes have to block out the thought that other people may have tried on a pair of shoes before me in a shoe store.

Idiosyncrasy?  Neurosis?  Just plain odd?

I don’t know.

And you can’t  judge me until you have walked in my shoes.

Just don’t literally walk in them, please.

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  1. Yes, he has several different pairs.  I don’t get it. []
  2. I don’t like them. []
  3. I highly recommend them. []

Wish Well

February 23rd, 2011 § 8 comments § permalink

30+ Day Challenge – Part 22: Three Wishes

If a genie came to me and offered only three wishes, I would use one for Granny, one for The Attorney, and one for myself.

For Granny I would wish that she could spend the rest of her days in good enough health to enjoy the time and know what she is experiencing.  I wouldn’t wish for her to live indefinitely or anything like that because she has already outlived most of her friends and all her children.  And I can’t imagine there is a lot of joy in that.

For The Attorney I would wish that he would be relieved of some of the obstacles he is facing in his work.  He is a good man, trying to do the right things, but unfortunately that is not always the popular viewpoint.

For myself, I would lighten the genie’s burden and go for something superficial.  I would wish for a meaty chest. Just enough to fill out a tight t-shirt.

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Stress Test

February 22nd, 2011 § 6 comments § permalink

30+ Day Challenge – Part 21: Something That Stresses You Out

This is a really tough one for me.  I don’t tend to sweat stuff.

Good, bad, or otherwise, I do my best to take things in stride.

Stuff can make me mad.  Stuff can make me anxious.  But not much truly stresses me.

I equate things going wrong  to eating something bad: This, too, shall pass.

I guess if I had to say something stressed me, I guess it would have to be dealing with Granny’s poor health.  It requires me to be on my toes a lot, and makes me have to plan my time away from her very carefully.

But, it’s also something I know I can handle.

I think that’s a key to not being stressed.  Knowing you can handle it.  Believing there is always a way.

Even if you don’t know what that way is.

You just have to believe.

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Nothing Borrowed or Blue

February 21st, 2011 § 11 comments § permalink

30+ Day Challenge, Part 20 – Your Dream Wedding

My Dream Wedding would be any wedding I don’t have to attend.

I have been to weddings.  I was even the best man at a wedding a few years ago.

But, I hate them.

I’d rather gnaw off my left nut than go to a wedding.

So, I definitely don’t dream of a wedding of my own.

Don’t get me wrong.  I’m not anti-marriage.

I’m anti-wedding.

Weddings just cause everyone involved to get all spun up and stressed out for weeks, or even months, leading up to the event.  Not to mention draining their bank accounts for months, or even years, to follow.

Anxious and broke.  What a way to start a life together.

Plus, I just don’t see the point in making your friends get all dressed up and then force them to watch you tell somebody you love him/her.

It’s just PDA1, but with a toast and presents.

As much of an exhibitionist that I can be, I’m really not the PDA type.2

Neither is The Attorney.  The closest we get to PDA is a shoulder bump thing that we do.

He probably is a bit more of the wedding type than I am.  So, if the day came that he would want some kind of ceremony, I would go along with it, of course.

But, I dream3 that it would be something very simple and private.

No flowers.  No toasts.  No several hundred dollar cake. 4

Nothing borrowed.  Nothing blue.

Just an agreement to continue to treat each other in a way that got us there in the first place.

And maybe some cake.  That doesn’t cost much.

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  1. Public Display of Affection []
  2. I’m probably more PDE: Public Display of Erection []
  3. and pray []
  4. Give me $25 and I can make you a cake from an empty pantry that will make you cream your underpants. []

Erector Set

February 20th, 2011 § 8 comments § permalink

Five ways to make my dick hard:

  1. Kiss me.
  2. Rub your stubbly chin on my belly.
  3. Roll it “rolling-pin” fashion against my thigh.
  4. Bite my neck.
  5. Do the Extended Puppy (yoga pose)

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Fourgy

February 17th, 2011 § 12 comments § permalink

OK.  So I am way behind on my 30+ Day Challenge.  Like 12 days behind, I believe.  I should be up to about Day 27 or 28 by now.  But the last one I posted was Day 15.  So, I’m going to make this one a multi-post.  Four in one.

Day 16-Nicknames

If you are reading this blog, you already know my nickname is “LargeTony.”  One word.  You also probably know why I have the nickname.  Or how I got it.  Or both.  If you are still clueless, I’ll just get to the point and explain it.

I have a plus-sized pecker. 1

I don’t really have any other nicknames.  Not anything I am called regularly or by any number of people.  I have a buddy who calls me “Meat.”  For the same reason as above, I guess.  But he is the only one who does.

A few people call me “T.”  But, that is just an abbreviation for Tony, which is just Anthony, for short.  None of which I would all a nickname.

Day 17 – Favorite Picture of Myself of All Time and Why

That would be this one.

I used this picture in the official farewell post on my old blog.  I mentioned then it was my favorite.  It still is.

Why is it my favorite?

To be honest, it’s mostly pure vanity.

It’s one of the few pictures where I think my face looks pretty good.  Also, I think my limbs are probably the best part of my body, and I think they come off well in this photo.

But beyond it being an image that makes me feel attractive, I like that I am looking up into the light.

Like I am focused on bigger brighter things.

Looking forward.

Never back.

Day 18 – Something I’ve Learned

There are a great many things I have learned.

I learn something every day.

We all do.

Whether we mean to or not.

It’s mostly a matter of whether we retain what we learned and what we do with that knowledge.

But probably the most important thing I have learned in recent years is about love:

Love gives you the the strength to do things you never thought you could; the capacity to do the things you never thought you would; and a reason to do the things that you should.

Day 19 – Put iPod on Shuffle.  First 10 Songs.

I don’t have a ton of stuff on my iPod.  Just a couple hundred songs, even though it holds something like 25,000.2 I wouldn’t even have an iPod if The Attorney had not given me one for Christmas a few years ago.  I would have never bought it for myself.  But, now that I do own one, I am happy to have it.  I mostly use it to listen to podcasts while I paint. But on to the shuffle:

  1. His Eye Is On The Sparrow – Mahalia Jackson
  2. You’re Looking At Country – Loretta Lynn
  3. Love Stoned/I Think She Knows – Justin Timberlake
  4. Baby Love – The Supremes
  5. Light of A Clear Blue Morning – Dolly Parton
  6. What Are You Doing New Year’s Eve – Nancy Wilson
  7. Baby Got Back – Sir MixAlot
  8. September – Earth Wind and Fire
  9. Proud Mary – Ike and Tina Turner
  10. This Love – Maroon 5

That probably all means something.  I don’t know what.

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  1. Which has a couple of nicknames of its own. []
  2. Like I even know 25,000 songs. []

Where am I?

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