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Another Man’s Shoes

I can be uptight.

It’s true.  As easy-going as I am about most things, there are some things I just can’t let go of.

The Attorney was up to the house the other evening and he brought with him three pairs of shoes.

Running shoes to be specific.

His running shoes to be more specific.

Well, to be truly specific, they are running shoes that he bought and, for whatever reason, did not make the cut to be a part of his regular rotation of running shoes.1

He had not worn any of the pairs more than a handful of times.  So, rather than throw them away he thought I might like them.

I don’t run, but I do like athletic shoes.  And size 14 is not always easy to come by.

Even so, I had to pass on them.

I know that on some level this is totally irrational, and no doubt connected to the issues I have with feet2, but the idea of wearing another man’s shoes really creeps me out.

Granted, I have worn a pair of The Attorney’s dress shoes once before out of necessity.  But these are athletic shoes.  Shoes that his big long-toed feet have sweated in.

True, he only wore them maybe 3-4 times each and there was always a sock in between shoes and flesh.  But a sock is not a sponge.  Unless, he wrapped his feet in a Sham Wow3 while hitting the pavement, there was some sweating into those insoles.

I have never hidden the fact that I am a little bit of a germ-a-phobe.

It bothers me that this bothers me.

I mean, it’s The Attorney.  Not some stranger.  I have visited virtually every square inch of his body over the last several years, and had much of it in my mouth (or at the very least against my lips or tongue).  If I am going to catch it, I already have it.

So, why am I bothered by the thought of wearing practically brand new shoes that he has stood in?

It’s the same thing that makes have to block out the thought that other people may have tried on a pair of shoes before me in a shoe store.

Idiosyncrasy?  Neurosis?  Just plain odd?

I don’t know.

And you can’t  judge me until you have walked in my shoes.

Just don’t literally walk in them, please.

{ fin }

  1. Yes, he has several different pairs.  I don’t get it. []
  2. I don’t like them. []
  3. I highly recommend them. []
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  1. As a runner I can totally relate the the Attorney’s sneaker quest. for serious runners it is a way of life unfortunately. I dont mean to laugh at your foot issue and/or germ thing but damn that post made me laugh. I am not a fan of feet either. When I was a young man, as an altar boy, I had to assist the priest in re-enacting Jesus washing of the feet during Lent. The guys chosen were all old and their feet,well I don’t think I need to elaborate. Let’s just say I skipped dinner that night. Haven’t thought about that in years. Thanks, I guess

  2. I never understood the foot-thing (fetish). Feet are the ugliest part of the body, in my humble opinion. Nice post.

  3. There is nothing irrational about this at all. If anything, it makes perfect sense, especially your distinction between dress shoes and running shoes. Borrowing the former is fine, stepping into the latter is just plain gross.

  4. well I wouldn’t wear used shoes either. Or second hand clothes. But I think it’s only coz we don’t have to.

  5. Ojo Ojo

    I disagree. I think it is very irrational. I think you should wear each pair in rotation for a month…just to get you over the craziness! LOL

  6. brian brian

    Sham Wow? Somehow I think you may have been traumitized by a germy foot.
    That which does not kill us….

  7. Oh dear. I’m all of a twitter and without a proper response. I’m a giant fan of a hot guy’s (nice, well taken care of, pretty…) feet. And that would include sneakers that he’s worn. Send him and his sneakers to me.

  8. Paul from Q Paul from Q

    You are entitled to any “odd” — your word — ideas you might entertain. It matters that you share so many other things. Thanks.

  9. California Alex California Alex

    I’m thinking the Attorney wasn’t too suprised when you passed on the running shoes.

  10. I have worn a boyfriends shoe without even the slightest second thought. Of course there has only been one BF that had close to the same size as me. I have no hang ups about feet. (as long as they are clean and well pampered.) I’ve sucked a toe or two in my day. lol

  11. Sponges are dirty and gross. I’ll take a sock anyday. I don’t have a foot fetish, but don’t have the skeeviness that you do about other people’s shoes.

  12. David David

    Well, my partner’s father died a couple of years ago and we both shared 10 and a half sized feet. There were a couple of dress shoes he rarely wore and I thought were a steal, so, yeah, I wear those to this day. Unfortunatly, Mr. D. didn’t have any up-to-date rarely worn athletic shoes. If he did…..I would have put them through the wash. That would have been my advise to you! …to each his own.

  13. jdw jdw

    This has to be one of the most humorous posts
    you have ever done. I guess I see your point
    at least I think I do. We all have some portion of our psyche that is totally irrational and I guess that is what makes us unique. I would have gladly taken the shoes.
    Underwear, no way in hell!!!!

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